I want the whole world to stop pretending that it likes beer

I still think about you often. Sometimes I get really sad. I miss you a lot and wish we could just be friends sometimes but I know that won’t work. Nothing will. But I really really hope to know you a few years from now. When you’ve matured and gotten your stuff together on your own. I’d be so proud.. I’m still really sorry.


If you find someone who can genuinely make you feel better no matter how hard of a time you’re going through, keep them close to you.


when you need to cough in an exam but you’ve already coughed like twice so you just sit there suffocating


how to get a girls panties wet:

  1. kiss her roughly 
  2. shove her down on the bed
  3. slip off her underwear
  4. slam dunk em in the toilet

(Source: yiffprince)


so i was ordering a top online and put “please” in the discount box and this happened

i got $0.20c off IM CRYING



i hate when people say that women should dress more modestly in order to “leave something to the imagination”. leave what to the imagination? what do people think is under my clothes? a mass of algae? memes? shinji ikari?


My taste in music ranges from “you need to listen to this” to “I know, please don’t judge me.”

(Source: fourwheeldevice)


my history professor told me today that he “likes the way I look vaguely pissed off” during class


once my sister got rejected for a job at a web design company that she really wanted to work for so that night she hacked into their website and redirected it to her blog and the next day the CEO called her and hired her on the spot so moral of the story: if at first you don’t succeed, hack their website and make them beg for mercy 

(Source: not-burnie)